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Day 9,

I woke this morning at silly-o'clock. I'd been having one of my recurring dreams, although it hadn't reoccurred for a while.

This one, like another recurring one, seems to date back to the same period in my life, 20 years ago when, during my college years my mum decided to up-sticks and move "us".

I managed to "run away" and avoid partaking in the bulk of packing, just managing to ship a few boxes off to relatives for safe-keeping until such a time as I might return.



The dream repeats my feelings of being overwhelmed by all the stuff I needed to pack, my bedroom being cluttered with stuff, and the encroaching deadline of the move. In my dream I'm the last to pack as I still try and stuff things into boxes (I sometimes have a similar dream where I'm trying to load too much stuff into my rucksack). There are some odd things though, such as my present-day counter-top cooker being in my old room, but as clean inside as I realised it was just yesterday. There are also some worthless paperback books I don't own, although I do have a fair few books (maybe my subconscious is trying not to be directly brutal about my own hoard).

There's a moment when it transpires that I'll be giving my brother a lift (in one of my previous cars, but not the one I had back then - I've found cars are often a muddle in dreams) and he holds out some petrol money. With this I consider the "fuel I'm going to burn" driving us the couple of hundred miles or so, or is this the emotional energy I'm expending having all this stuff to stress over?

It seems to me that recurring dreams are recurring for a reason: we haven't resolved/overcome the situation/issues they represent. I realise this is especially true when my house is as cluttered as my bedroom was back then.

I woke with a renewed urge to declutter; to just throw stuff out from my past and do away with all these things that are taking up space.

I went through a phase of decluttering a while back though and when I moved on from that I felt a sadness and longing for the things I had parted with.

Thankfully, earlier this year I got over the compulsion to routinely scour ebay for things to acquire. I'm not sure what changed in my head but I just remember I suddenly thought "no, I have enough stuff, I'm not even going to browse today." Even though I'd been trying to manage this issue for a while. The problem now is that I have things I bought for various reasons, and it's as if I'm going against myself and the reasons I bought them; they're projects for me to be getting on with, so I should just be getting on them and not discarding them.

This morning's moon, although not visible to me*, was a Waning Crescent beside Venus in the constellation of Virgo. ChatGPT suggests the following:

"One might interpret this combination as a time for reflective and practical consideration of matters related to love, beauty, and values. It could be a period for letting go of what no longer serves you in these areas and seeking a more practical and organized approach to your relationships and aesthetic preferences."

*Having said all that, I used Stellarium to show me the Moon's location and phase, whereas on the 1st I simply used, which I now see tells me something different, claiming this is occurring in Scorpio. Which is correct I do not know, but the interpretation is perhaps similar:

"This combination suggests a period where individuals may feel inclined to release old relationship patterns, attachments, or values that are no longer in alignment with their evolving emotional needs. There could be a desire for transformation and a willingness to explore the depths of emotions."

I think it's important to remember that we don't have to be the same people we were a few years ago.